Sometimes

Sometimes I read an e-mail from an old friend or talk with them on the phone and smile at how their life has changed since we last spoke. Then I wonder if my life has changed that much. I graduated almost a year ago and don't feel much more settled or secure than I did last April. I don't know if I am simply waiting for something to happen, or if I am too scared to take a step into the darkness and take some risks.

I wonder how I will ever know what I am to do, if I am too stubborn to take a chance. I just have a hard time putting it all on the line, if I don't know what the outcome will be. I like playing it safe. I like having two feet on the ground. But maybe it would be good for me to branch out and just take a leap of faith. I just don't know which direction to go... If I knew maybe I wouldn't be so frightened of what's out there.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say, but these are just thoughts that I have had lately. I love my job, but that's pretty much the only thing keeping me in Provo. Is that enough? Should I be somewhere else?? If you know the answers... Please let me know!!

Smile!

On Tuesday night a man came up to the desk and saw my co-worker and I chatting. He made some small talk with us and then asked for the item that he was looking for.

As he left he said this, "Smile! You know why we should smile? Because we know who we are! We are children of God! We are potential Gods and Goddesses! We KNOW who we are!"

I don't know who that man is or if I will ever see him again, but his words caused me to think! I am so grateful for the knowledge that I know who I am! I am so thankful for the Atonement, especially at this Easter Season!

His comment not only brought a smile to my lips, but a feeling of gratitude to my heart!

Disrespect

A gentleman was using his cell phone up on the 2nd floor this morning. I politely asked him to take it downstairs since we do not allow cell phones up on the second floor. This floor is our quiet floor and we try to keep it as quiet as possible. He looked at me and nodded. Then as soon as I went back to my desk, instead of going downstairs like I had asked, he simply shut the copy room door. It makes me frustrated that grown adults refuse to comply with simple rules. I did not ask him to hang up the phone or even leave the library. I just asked him to go down stairs. When he finished with his call I reminded him again that cell phones were not allowed up here. He didn't seem to care, and left the floor.

Why are people so stubborn and disrespectful? I know that because of my size I probably do not demand the respect that I think I deserve. However I am the one that is employed by the library and I am the one that has to enforce it's rules. I just wish that people didn't make life harder for themselves, by refusing to do relatively easy things!

And then there were Six...

So my roommate Emily R. got engaged this weekend. I came home from Stake Conference to see this MASSIVE bouquet of flowers on the table. There was no doubt about it. She was/or already had gotten engaged!

I knew from just seeing the flowers that a ring was on her finger. I had seen all of the signs before and once again I was right!

Emily makes the SIXTH roommate of mine to get engaged while I was living with them! Six! Many others have gotten married since I have lived with them and a few of them now have children.

I am so happy for Emily and all of the others that have found their eternal companions. I have learned a lot from living with engaged girls and am glad that I am now at the point in my life that I can truly feel excited and no longer jealous.

I wish Emily the best of luck!

(P.S. When talking to my mom on the phone yesterday, she suggested that I post this sign when I move into my new apartment.)

Looking to get married? Just live with Ann-Marie! She has a 78% success rate!

And that is what mom's are for! :)

Crazy People

There were some really crazy people at work today.
One woman wanted to know the burial place of some actress that was once married to a millionaire. I am not sure why that is so critical to her life, but it was very important to her! She then proceeded to print about a million things while our printer was being stupid and then asked me to keep track of her printouts so that she could write a check when she was finished. After printing each job she would, even so "kindly" ask me if I had written it down. Like I was the idiot that couldn't keep track of what was being printed!
Another gentleman came up to the desk twice to ask if he hadn't made any printouts. How was I supposed to know if he didn't print, if there was no evidence either way. I couldn't exactly ask him what he didn't print!
And the craziest of all... a guy was sitting in one of the chairs by the big stained glass window. He was talking to himself and making motions with his hands. Then he got up, looked at his chair and started chuckling to himself. He then asked me to log him onto the computers and told me that if something didn't work I would need to log him onto another computer. "Just to be sure that I can do what I want to do".
Some days these crazy people really try my patience. And today was one of those days!

Rituals

When Caroline and I shared a room we had this "ritualistic" conversation almost every night before we went to bed. After getting ready for bed, we would slip under the covers and have a conversation that went like this...

Caroline: "Ahhh, bed!"
Ann-Marie: "This is the best part of the day!"

We would giggle, say good night and go to sleep.

I don't remember when we first started doing this, but we would have this conversation at least once a week for quite a few months.

I miss those days. And sometimes I still repeat that converstation to myself before going to sleep. In fact I did just the other night. (Lucky for me, my room-roommate was not in the room at the time. She might think that I'm crazy, if I start talking to myself!)

This one's for Leah!

Before Leah left Provo (well and when she was still here...) she kept asking me to write a blog. So here I am. I have joined the masses!

It took me a while to figure out how to do this whole blog thing. And with A LOT of help from Em (she found my typo!) I am now a part of the blogging community!

I hope that I have something interesting to say every now and then!